Is it True?

Five things that are wildly popular, but not always true.

Some days, clearly, are better than others. Not a single one shows the entirety of our full picture.

We can’t tell which image we see online is the truth of a person’s soul, life or circumstance. We believe that we know because what was taken versus what is true is OUR interpretation of the images we see.

Photo by jasmin chew on

We are master movie makers in the digital media we put into the world. We see the image of a beautiful woman (assuming she’s beautiful) walking through a field of flowers, but often times, never see her face. What would it look like if we were able to see her face in that moment?

Would she be crying? Is someone forcing her to walk in that field? Is she allergic to the flowers, but really wanted the shot? Is she stoned or starving hungry because she wants to fit in, but also wants to stand out?

We assume she’s happy, peaceful and content with her life.


Because we need her to be in order to complete the picture in our mind.

In today’s climate, we have to have one of three things to be considered desirable

  1. Great wealth
  2. Great beauty
  3. Great status

If you have any combo meal of these, you’re accepted into the fold.

Without them, you are left to your own devices to manufacture your life on your own.

The irony is, after working your tail off to achieve success status, then, and only then, do those same OG powerful people want to slip into your DM’s to collaborate with you.

Translation for my generation ~ only after success is achieved do people want to be around us.

Another trend I’m noticing is that the MOST successful influencers are also coupled up with someone who strangely, looks like them. Happy couples are all the rage right now.

They don’t necessarily have an advantage over solopreneurs, but they do have someone else to hold the camera and write the script.

Is it real life? Not always. But we NEED our influencers to be to be whole, complete versions of our ideal life.

In a world full of chaos, we need to believe in the happily ever after.

Like the cute 1st time mom with financial abundance, giving parenting advice while hiding the train wreck that is her internal struggle. OR, the handsome dude who was a monk for a year because he lacked direction, but because he is dreamy in his appearance, people flock to him for advice.

Where is the tired mom of four kids who is not cute, but has been through hell and back, and she’s tired but wise? I want to know her.

Where are the unattractive monks who practiced their peace for decades, alone, not hanging out with Oprah? I want to know them.

I firmly believe we can learn a little bit of life from all of them.

Not all life from any one of them.

What came first? The expert opinion or the illusion and followers who demanded to know more. Are they experts or just … popular?

Ah, now there’s a great tale to tell.

The five things that are conditional at best?

  1. Thinking positive thoughts will fix everything ~ it won’t. It helps, but not always. This social expectation can actually devastate someone who is struggling.
  2. No response is also a response. Sure. An immature one that denotes a lack of confidence in one’s self, not to mention a common tactic of a gaslighting narcissist.
  3. Smiling people are happy people. Sometimes, people smile to sell you something. Sometimes, to disguise their pain. One never knows without also noticing the nuances of the human themselves.
  4. Thin people are happier than heavier people. This is a wildly socially accepted sizesm that is simply not true for all people. It leaves out way too many variables.
  5. Wealthier people are those we should look up to. Nope. Only a few. Not all. Again, variables. I have little interest in hearing what a trust fund baby or full ride Ivy Leaguer has to say unless they also contribute a whole hearted goodness to the world. Those who are backed so they simply can’t fail, aren’t necessarily the best motivational speakers. They are just the ones who can afford to try.

I ask questions ~ millions of them. It doesn’t mean I’m criticizing as much as I’m critically thinking about the reality of what I see.

I narrow the questions down as I learn until … I make my own hypotheses.

In other words, If I call bullshit on a thing, it’s because I spent a lot of time studying that thing for a great while.

Does anybody care? Not necessarily. But then, not a one of us are here to live the lives of others. We are here to learn about our own lives, and our own journey.

My master’s training in community psychology taught me to question everything and everyone. My doctoral training taught me to observe all the nuances and variables before assuming anything or anyone to be true.


We are just blindly accepting meme quotes or 3 minute talks as if they are gospel.

People want easy button answers or solutions. Those are NOT the truth of a thing. They are the lazy answers.

Sadly, there are some truly damaging concepts floating around that are wrecking people’s ability to appreciate the hard work it takes to make it in this world.

To all those who feel like a failure, or an Unsuccessful person, or someone who is exhausted from working just to make ends meet ~ please know … I HOPE you know … working toward a goal takes a hella more than just thinking about what you want.

Manifesting (regardless of the science or philosophy behind it) ~ takes focused, determined, hour by hour work. In equal measures, it also takes a LOT of letting go and trusting that the work will pay off. A day off is as detrimental to your success as the days on.

Keep going … it’s the journey, not the destination.

I know!!!! I’m quoting memes on purpose. To be ironic. Perhaps, sardonic. LOL

Cheers to your journey … it really is one of the great meme truths that is true.


@happinessnoir @inkhoneypub

Henry Healing is my home base ~ the nest for all other things.

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