When is it too soon?

My 16 year old dog died in November of 2021. Honestly? I still call him when I’m distracted from reality.

Rocco of the House of Henry Healing, circa 2020

SO much grief around my pet life goes unsaid on the internet, but part of the trauma that I had to heal from was the loss of so many pets over the past decade, that it’s hard to talk about.

But Rocco? My little chubby chihuahua who was the best dog ever, had a hard-to-watch last few months. His death was a relief to his suffering, but it was also a reality check.

I’m bringing it up today ’cause facebook just reminded me that we moved into our house exactly two years ago, sharing a picture of a wiggling, then playful elder pup who was still happy to kick around with us. He had just gotten a hair cut. I remember how good he felt.

When it’s time for them to go, they go. I know he was 16 and I know that his little body wasn’t going to last forever, but to this day, I miss him. A lot.

I don’t think I’m ready for a new pup, but I got one over the summer after I became an empty nester. He’s also a really good boy, but sometimes, I catch myself calling him Rocco, then I stop, feeling that twinge of sadness all over again.

When we share a close bond with someone, no matter how their soul comes into our lives, their departure is just as emotional.

That dog was my best friend and constant companion through the hardest, most horrible years of my life. He always smiled at me. He always snuggled. No questions asked.

The new guy will be just as meaningful eventually. I know that you can’t really replace a beloved dog just by getting a new one.

You have to give yourself time to grieve. Sometimes, they see your sad from beyond the veil, so they send a new guy into your life to help you heal the hurt.

At least, that’s what I’d like to believe. Hope to believe.

Over the past two years, we have all felt so much pain, and grief and loss. I’m very convinced that’s why we’re all so emotional on the internet all the time.

We have unconditional collective grief that needs some space and a lot of grace.

Now, back to work ~ I have things to paint and new memories to make.

KH

Waiting by Karen Henry

4 thoughts on “When is it too soon?

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  1. This one is a lovely post! I understand every single word of it, of yours. I’ve been through exactly the same. Ma girl, oh, ma girl! Lilly. The best mate, I dare to say soulmate ever! 14 years. Almost 6 years since she’s gone and I still see her… Inbetween Bento came into our lives for a short period of time: 3 years. Apparently to BE loved até last. And… Me…I was so damn insecure and thinking: Will I ever be able to love a dog the same way I uses to love Lilly?! It takes time. But we can do it. Oh, yeah! Now we have Mel since 2019. We adopted her até the age of 6 months,full of life and sweetness.She’s no substitute: she’s Mel.

    Thanks for being a sensitive human being! Thanks for sharing your feelings and emotions! Thanks for your art!

    Love

    🍀

    Like

  2. This one is such a wonderful post! I understand every single word of it, of yours. I’ve been through exactly the same. Ma girl, oh, ma girl! Lilly. The best mate, I dare to say, the best soulmate ever! 14 years long. It’s been almost 6 years since she left us and I still see her going around… Inbetween Bento came into our lives for a short period of time: almost 3 years. Apparently, so it seemed to be,to find love at last. First I was so damn insecure thinking: Will I ever be able to love a dog the same way I used to love Lilly?! But we did love him, we still do. Death doesn’t put an end to love, whether the beloved creature is your pet or your mum. Love is love and eternal as long as our memory does not betray us.
    Now we ‘have’ Mel since 2019. We adopted her at the age of 6 months,full of life and sweetness.She’s no substitute: she’s Mel. Mel means ‘honey’ in portuguese, my mother language.
    Sorry… It has not been my intention neither to annoy you, nor to “invade” your blog with my “stories”… 😉🙈

    I do thank you for being such a sensitive human being! Thanks for sharing your feelings and emotions! Thanks for your beautiful art!

    Love

    🍀

    Like

  3. I feel for your loss. I have an old cocker spaniel and dread the few more years she probably has to live, but that only makes the current moments that much more meaningful. I guess the pain has to be there for it to have any meaning. Wishing you all the best!

    Like

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